Gossip: Neighbour Of The Hoors

I was over at my mum and dad's the other day and we were talking about where we used to live when I was a kid.

We used to have this neighbour. She stuck her nose into everyone's business. If someone was getting a divorce, she was the first to know. If someone's son was in jail, she was the first to know. Apparently one local girl was pregnant and unmarried (this was the 70's I think) and the woman went to the door of her mother (a complete stranger!) just to find out... to get her facts right before she went round to spread the gossip!

I found this hilarious... and almost a little unbelievable. But my mum assured me this kind of woman was common in the days when neighbours met in closes and out in the drying green and on the stairs.

"Oh! It's such a shame people like this don't exist any more!" I squealed, mourning the loss of such an amazing cultural stereotype of times gone by: The Gossipy Auld Wifie.

The auld wifie whose business it was to know what all her neighbours were up to...

Who was shagging who...
Who had a drink problem...
Who had lost their job...
Who was in trouble with the police...
And the auld wifie whose place it was to make sure that everyone else knew what her neighbours were up to. It's such a shame they're a thing of the past.

Then I paused. Considering "My Neighbours Are Hoors."

Shit.

Pot.
Kettle.
Black.