My Neighbours Are Hoors!: Upon my return...

Sunday, May 15, 2005

Upon my return...

I go away for 2 weeks and upon my return...

I discover something.

Something I am very, very proud of.

My Neighbours Are Hoors has its first FLAME WAR! *squeals delightedly*

For the record...

1) I have no problem with the way people write comments on my blog. Doric is good. Scots is good. If anyone wants any more words added to the My Neighbours Are Hoors Glossary (TM), then that is no problem! :)

2) However... txt spk is bloody annoying 4|\||) 50 15 1337 5p34|< (although very much more amusing than txt spk

3) Fudge is teh language expert. Don't mess with her or she'll tie you in celtic knots. (Pun most definitely intended) . Irvine Welsh? Pah! Gimme Buff Hardie any time. Actually. I'd really like a version of "Trainspotting the WHAT!?"

4) Many more flame wars welcome of course - especially if they're in cockney rhyming slang, sanskrit, that language masai warriors use with the clicking, and of course... Wookie. ;)

Also, I'm almost at 30,000 hits! Bloody hellfire! Guess I'd better start posting again after my long phase of Apathy. (So marked it needs a capital A). My Tillydrone Correspondant has been having an eventful time of it in my absence, so I'll be reporting on that soon!

P.S. Bedouin bag of kittens gone now - cheers! ;)

P.P.S. Check out My Crazy Neighbour which has had a great refurbishment - Welcome back!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...: Hi, just discovered your blog, have to say it's just the most entertaining thing I've read in a long while. I know where you live (not in a nightmare stalker kind of way!) so it's all the more interesting to read. I live in Cornwall but pass through your hometown as I work offshore, that being the second most famous thing about the place, after the hoors of course! Also, working offshore means I don't need a translator as some of your readers seem to; 2:47 pm

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Cast of Main Players

Back in 2006, I decided to list the main players in my blog in a handy column to ease any reader's confusion. That, and I wanted The Nice Neighbours to read this before they thought I was slagging them off and were likely to come downstairs to beat me up with a big hammer!

This is the text as it stood in January 2006.

NEIGHBOUR OF TEH HOORS - i.e. ME. I have been living above a brothel for almost eight years. The novelty still hasn't worn off.

THE HOORS live on the ground floor in a one bedroom flat and are Prostitutes. They aren't from round these parts, but come up to The Grey Toon from places like London, Liverpool, Bristol and Birmingham because the The Grey Toon is tolerant and full of oil money.

THE DEAD MAN is the (ex?) alcoholic who used to look like a Zombie. Has been looking very healthy lately, so I think he's given up the drink.

THE COUNCIL MAN livesw on the ground floor opposite the hoors and is a very nice man. He works for the council and once offered me the use of his drain rods.

SHETLAND BOY lives with his girlfriend in the flat above me. Both are ideal neighbours. Not actually from Shetland. I think one of my friends thought he was and so the name stuck.

SHETLAND GIRL owns the flat next to Shetland Boy and is also very lovely. She has moved out though, and her Little Brother lives there now. Again, not actually from Shetland.

LITTLE BROTHER/BUSTED now live in Shetland Girl's flat. Seemed to be very polite spikey haired youths until they started holding chimp's tea parties but with Tennents and not Tetleys.

TNWTCH or, The Neighbour With The Cool Hair - lives next to me (Edit from 2012 - lovely, lovely bloke who I ever bump into when I'm steamin'). One couldn't wish for a better neighbour.

THE BOY - is my boyfriend who moved in a month or so ago. So far he is not put off by the fact his girlfriend lives above a brothel.